VT Appointment 37 – When Life Gives You Lemons

Click here to read about last week’s appointment.

How did the Last Two Weeks Go?

It is so interesting to watch my ups and downs through these posts…well it is interesting to me. Just a few weeks ago I had a pretty spiritual experience where I knew that I was on the right path with fixing my vision and I had clear plans for how to do it. I was SO motivated and was doing amazing…

Then crap hit the fan and I felt like my life got turned upside down.

On the way home from an epic camping trip that will NEVER be forgotten, our truck started on fire and eventually it burned, with our camper, to the ground. With no comprehensive insurance, it was a pretty heartbreaking loss for our family.

Then a few days later our “reliable” family car’s entire brake system went out and we were suddenly down to one tiny car.

It feels like everywhere I look, I see dollar signs screaming at me for money.

It has been such a challenging week for us. I still went to my vision therapy appointment (it was paid for already) and was determined to quit and just give up on life in general. A few family members found out about my plans to quit and convinced me to keep going.

So here I am, still going. I guess I am going to find out how persistent and resilient I really am!

While we were camping we went on several four wheeler rides and I had some cool experiences with “seeing big” like David Cook talks about in his book, “The Shape of the Sky.” I don’t know if I was seeing with stereopsis, or just opening my peripheral and taking more in.

Four wheelers are pretty scary for me and I always am in the back and going sooooo slow because I don’t feel comfortable. I realized that it is because I have sketchy depth perception and it’s hard to see rocks, ruts or other “bumps” in the trail.

I tried to open up my peripheral and “see big” and it made a huge difference! I could see so much more and realized I had been just staring at the trail directly in front of me, like in this picture. I was literally just watching the ground just in front of me.

When I opened up my peripheral I could take in so much more and was a much better driver. It was CRAZY the difference that it made! And I felt like I was in this never-ending tunnel, like the trail went on forever. It was a really interesting experience. I would forget and realize that I was back to looking with only one eye when things were scary and bumps were coming out of nowhere, so I’d engage both eyes and see big and it all went so much better!

Another exciting thing that I experienced recently was learning a new way to fuse. I was watching another iheartVT lecture by Dr. David Cook (can you tell I’m obsessed with him right now?) and he was explaining how to do a particular fusion exercise, so naturally I had to try it right away.

Here are the basic steps.

1. Get a 3×5 card or just a small piece of paper and draw a circle on it.
2. Put it in front of your dominant eye.
3. Focus on something across the room with your non-dominant eye.
4. Allow yourself to see the illusion that the circle is around the object that you are trying to see.
5. Tip: try wiggling the paper and moving it different distances to make it work.
6. Tip 2: give it time. I didn’t see it at first, but after a minute or so of trying, I first saw little hints of both, then the circle started moving over, then it suddenly fused and there was a perfect circle around the object directly in front of me. CRAZY!
7. Tip 3: Try different sized items. I couldn’t make it work with a cup, doorknob, or soap dispenser that were about 10-15 feet away, but I made it work with a giant pumpkin that was about 5 feet away.

Dr. Cook talked about how strabismics struggle with these types of activities because they defy reality. There is NOT an actual circle around the pumpkin. There is a circle on the paper and a pumpkin on the counter. Trying to see them together defies my reality.

He said that instead of telling them it’s reality, to focus on telling them that they are trying to see an illusion, something that is totally fake. This has been ground breaking for me. I can answer my brain and say, “I know, the circle is not actually around the pumpkin, but we are going to look for the illusion that it is. I know it seems super simple, but, I promise, it is a really amazing concept that has been helping me!

I have never been able to do one of these free-space fusion type of activities. I can see vectograms and VTS4 3D images, but this fusion was a huge step in the right direction for me! I am excited to keep practicing it.

How did My Appointment Go?

Confession, I am writing this over a week after my appointment and I can not remember much about the actual appointment. I do remember that we were working hard with VTS4 at a distance and I was getting some great stereopsis. My numbers weren’t as high as they are close up, but I was able to get within some more normal ranges which was a huge improvement on last week.

I was struggling so much and then Dr. Dan decided to make the image on the screen super small and all the sudden, I was able to do it so easily! I realized that I wasn’t able to see all the parts of the multiple choice vergence at the same time so I wasn’t able to compare and determine which one was closest. Once he made it small, I could see them all together and it was easy to compare.

Sounds like it is time for me to expand my ZOSA (zone of simultaneous awareness, AKA peripheral vision). It is definitely a work in progress.

And that’s all I remember, so instead of making something up I’m going to just be done because this post is plenty long.

Goodbye for now, hoping that we can all figure out how to meet and overcome every obstacle that life gives us.

Homework

1. Eye Control- Hold hands together and interlock fingers except the pointer fingers. Slowly rub the two pointer fingers together and try to engage both eyes and keep them focused on the fingers as you move them from side to side.
2. Virtual Reality
3. Gem
4. Brock String